The Finanser is on holiday until 7th September but will be posting
the odd thing here every now and then.
By odd, we mean very odd, with
a mixture of news, views and lots of jokes about banking.
every morning, you'll wake up for the next two weeks with a little bit
of financial fun, courtesy of our absent host.
Today, we begin with a little education in post credit crunch financial terminology.
A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
Another random market movement causing months where the children get no allowance, the wife gets no jewellery, and the husband gets no sex.
The art of buying low and selling lower.
The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
How much broker my broker has made me.
STANDARD & POOR
Your life in a nutshell.
The idiot who just downgraded your stock.
When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
The day after you buy stocks.
The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
An archaic word no longer in use.