I guess these desperate times cause desperate actions, as the last few weeks must have created the funniest spate of bank robberies ever seen.
First, there was the Russian Sumo wrestler who wrestled an ATM out of the wall …
You always wondered why these sumo wrestlers gained all that weight
and became the size of an elephant. Why would they need to be that big?
Why would they need to be so strong? Why not create a lightweight
division? Well now we know.
In Moscow, an enormous man that is thought to be a
sumo wrestler yanked out an ATM cash machine that weighed 200 pounds,
put it up on his shoulders and took off with it on his shoulders. The
cash machine was said to have over 25,000 roubles in it.
But here's the kicker: the sumo wrestler and the machine were found
by police after they stopped a 'BMW with tinted windows' that didn't
even have license plates. What kind of BMW fits a sumo wrestler and a
cash machine? What kind of moron tries to pull off such a heist in a car
without license plates?
Then you have Kung Fool Sohn Kang-min of South Korea …
A hapless bank robber was floored when he took a pensioner hostage
during a raid – an expert at deadly Taekwondo.
Black belt Park
Hyung-tae, 69, decked knife wielding Sohn Kang-min, 28, instantly at the
bank in Miryang, South Korea, and was then blasted with tear gas spray
by the teller.
As he staggered out the door, the branch manager
hit his head with a baseball bat sending him reeling into the arms of
delivery man who wrestled him to the ground until police arrived.
But surely, the St Patrick's Day gang win the Darwin Award …
A leprechaun bank robber and his getaway driver were killed in a
police after a St Patrick’s Day raid in Tennessee. Police said that the same man had held up a bank in Nashville three days
before Christmas — dressed as Santa Claus.
Bradley Webb, a witness to the leprechaun raid, said: “He had a long black cape or dress on, a fake black beard; probably a 2½
leprechaun hat.” The robber then held up the First State Bank with a gun and ran out to
getaway car, a silver Toyota Corolla.
The police chased the suspects to a field outside town where the duo
their car and fled on foot, leaving the leprechaun hat on the back seat. As they ran, they turned and shot at pursuing officers, who returned
Last night police identified the leprechaun as David Cotton, 20,
his getaway driver as Jonathan Skinner, a student at Western Kentucky
The preliminary investigation suggested that Mr Skinner was shot by
that the leprechaun killed himself.
Oh yea, Skinner … no relation … but the leprechaun? That's another matter 🙂