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Humour

Banking in 2013 … just like 1913

Natwest_coin_bags

So I’m buying a house and have a conversation about the house buying process with a bank colleague. He is adamant that this is where the branch comes into its own. I disagreed, but accepted that it may be different in different markets, but that all markets are moving in …

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You bunch of losers

Fatcat

Blah, blah, blah goes the talking head on the news. Banks … bad … money … sell … losses … Groan, moan, dull, boring. Ripoff … scandal … government … economy … bonuses … fatcat … Depressing, stop it, shut up, no. Millions … billions … balance sheet … profits …

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You bunch of losers

Fatcat

Blah, blah, blah goes the talking head on the news. Banks … bad … money … sell … losses … Groan, moan, dull, boring. Ripoff … scandal … government … economy … bonuses … fatcat … Depressing, stop it, shut up, no. Millions … billions … balance sheet … profits …

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The world’s best and worst job titles

Chief unicorn division

How the world has changed. We all realise the world is changing fast when you look back ten, twenty or fifty years.  Ten years ago, there was on iPhone or Facebook.  Twenty years ago, the end of the Soviet Union, the removal of the Berlin Wall and the aftermath of …

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The world’s best and worst job titles

Chief unicorn division

How the world has changed. We all realise the world is changing fast when you look back ten, twenty or fifty years.  Ten years ago, there was on iPhone or Facebook.  Twenty years ago, the end of the Soviet Union, the removal of the Berlin Wall and the aftermath of …

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Holiday Humour #10: Telephone Numbers

Dialled salary

A few discussions about telephone numbers. I asked an economist for her phone number….and she gave me an estimate. And finally, dedicated to all those bankers waiting for their bonuses. Note: thanks to EU rules bankers are now paid salaries, not bonuses  

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Holiday Humour #8: Being Rich

Super-rich-woman-in-money-009

As Logan Pearsall Smith said:  "It is the wretchedness of being rich that you have to live with rich people" Or, as Spike Milligan said: "Money couldn't buy you friends, but you get a better class of enemy." But the real point of being rich is to stay close to your …

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Holiday Humour #7: Wills

Will

A few wry notes on inheritances and wills …   SHE: Do you love me just because my Daddy left me a fortune in his will? HE: No.  I'd love you whoever had left you the fortune.     One of the shortest wills ever written:  Being of sound mind, I …

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Holiday Humour #6: Accountants

Accountants

Accountants are an integral part of the financial system, as the holders of debits and credits, cashflow and balance sheets. Known as boring folks: A woman went to the doctor, who broke her the dreadful news that she only had six months left to live. "That's terrible doctor, what should …

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Holiday Humour #5: Auditors

Auditor

A bank went out to tender for a new auditor. They narrowed the choices to three of the Big Four, and invited them in for a final presentation. The first audit firm did an amazing presentation. At the end, the bank CEO said: "that was incredible.  We would like to …

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Holiday Humour #4: Short of cash

Money

During this crisis, we're all finding ourselves a bit short of cash.  By way of example, the UK National Lottery has just announced a special draw to support RBS with a £5 m,illion prize fund … if you win, you get £5 a year for a million years! Walking through …

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